The past week was a more challenging one than most; the first since the publication of Poolhall Jail Library where I began to question its merit and how worthy it was as a story. I think every author probably faces that - and I definitely did many times over in the conception phase. But this is the first time since it was printed that I had returned to that way of thinking. I slowed down on promotion and began thinking it was time to move on to the next thing, and bury what I had written as deeply away as possible.
Yet, as so often happens in life, I got a kick to the butt at the appropriate time. This letter landed last night and changed a lot of my thinking:
“I finished your book yesterday. Given the strong theme of travel throughout, rather then finish it sitting at home, I saved the last 50 pages to read when I was holidaying overseas.
Part of me was tempted to just shoot you a quick message and say “Well done. Congratulations. Great book” because I’m not usually one to talk about deeper stuff and normally just gloss over things and move on. But I figure if there is ever an occasion to take the time to touch on some things in a bit more detail, it’s on the back of a book that doesn’t shy away from the deeper stuff and is as honest as yours is.
I grew up reading your articles in Rugby League Week, and getting to know you a little bit over the years; between your music choices in the gym, the tattoos, the boxing and kickboxing, your work getting Latin Heat Rugby League to where it is, and your endless career at Wests Mitchelton, I’ve always found you fascinating and got the sense there was a fair bit to you as a person.
When I heard you were writing Poolhall Jail Library I anticipated an interesting story… however I didn’t expect the level of complexity, adversity and brutality, but more importantly the resilience, determination and self-awareness that make up that story.
I also wasn’t expecting your book to have the impact on me that it did.
It firstly had an impact because there were a lot of elements within your story that I could relate to. Obviously there is the geography of where we both grew up, the role Rugby League has played in my life and shaped me as a person, along with the fact that I was also the first person in my family to go to university and be afforded the opportunities that opened up.
Additionally, it had an impact because it made me reflect on some of the less positive elements of my life, such as growing up in a Housing Commission home in north-west Brisbane with just me and my mum, who found herself as a single mother after fleeing an abusive husband. This had ramifications financially, socially, emotionally - and even in the relationship between Mum and I today.
It also made me think of how it was ultimately this circumstance which led to the development of an immensely close relationship with my uncle (whose influence on my life is only paralleled by that of mum), which I wouldn’t trade for anything. My uncle’s untimely passing when I was just 18 is still the hardest thing I’ve ever faced.
Reading your story, I was reminded that, while these things aren’t ideal, aren’t pleasant and aren’t the circumstances you’d select if given the choice – they ultimately make you who you are today, the good and the bad.
And whilst they certainly aren’t glamorous or nice to talk about, they are part of the story nonetheless and shouldn’t be ignored (which I’m often guilty of – in fact very few people outside of my very closest family and friends know anything it).
Additionally, it had an impact on a lighter note too, I had to laugh when I was laying in bed one night reading and my wife asked me how the book was going and I told her that there were some similarities in our backgrounds I had not expected. Then the VERY next page you referenced a song which had great meaning to me.
Finally, your book had an impact on me because of the elements I simply couldn’t begin to relate to. Some of the situations you have faced in your life are confronting to merely read. The fact you have not only faced them but come out the other side is remarkable. I’ve read a stack of stories/books that involve resilience and grit, however where this is so unique and so inspiring is that you pull no punches and have such strong self-awareness, realism and optimism –you don’t try and sugar-coat it or hide from it - you own your mistakes and acknowledge your weaknesses and just get on with your life.
Well done. Congratulations. Great book!”
